Respect - The Key To Keeping A Conscious Alpha Man

As strong, independent woman, if you haven't learned how to adequately show your man respect, your relationships won't survive. Join me, Natalie Ford - dating and relationship expert - as I explore "Why is respect so important to a Conscious Alpha Man?" and "What exactly do men need to feel respected?" In this educational and insightful episode, discover this and much more about what it takes to create a lasting relationship with a Conscious Alpha Man.

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Transcript

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[Intro music] Hello and welcome! I am Natalie Ford, founder and CEO of Enchanted Academy For Love. And you are listening to The Enchanted Love Podcast! I am here to help strong, independent women let down the defences that have caused them to reject, repel, and sabotage love, so that they can transform these and finally call in the Happy Ever After that they have been longing for. Please help me get this message out there by liking, subscribing and sharing our material. And I hope you enjoy this week's edition of The Enchanted Love Podcast. Hello and welcome to the second episode of the Enchanted Love Podcast. Today we are talking about why your ability to respect your man can either make or break your relationship. Now, one of the big reasons that contributes towards why strong independent women fail to be able to attract and keep long term a conscious alpha man is because they don't understand how to truly respect a man. Because they don't really understand how deep that runs for a man and how incredibly important it is. It literally is a make or break for your relationship. So, today we are going to be exploring three questions to support you to understand this and to be able to show up in a way for your conscious alpha man so that he feels respected and so that ultimately you can reap the rewards and benefits of being in relationship with such an incredible being by showing up for him in the ways that feel important to him. So, we are going to be exploring three questions today from a relationship psychology point of view.

These questions are: 2:19

Why is it so important for a conscious alpha man to feel respected by his woman? What does he need in order to feel respected by us? And thirdly, on a more practical level, how do we need to show up to facilitate this? What is needed from us from a practical point of view so that our man does feel respected by us? So, in the previous episode of the Enchanted Love Podcast, we looked at why the strong independent women struggle to find lasting love. This episode is going to build somewhat on that. So if you haven't listened to it, then you might want to do that first. But it's not absolutely necessary because a lot of the concepts I will explain here anyway. Okay, so let's dive in. When I was in the phase of my relationship learning, where I was able to get relationships with beautiful conscious alpha men, but I could not keep them, I had no idea how important it was to respect a man and how deep that went for them. I thought respect just meant that you thought highly of somebody. I was like,' I love this man, I adore him! Of course I respect him!' For me, it just seemed like a given. It didn't seem like something that required work or extra effort on my behalf. And this was actually one of my major downfalls, why my relationships did not last. Because what I'm going to talk to you about today is why this is so, so important for men. And I'm going to explore the relationship psychology around that and help you understand just how much you need to take this on board if you want to be in a lasting forever relationship with a conscious alpha man. So what I want to prefix about this particular episode is that this episode is going to be more of a teaching episode than, say, my material will be usually. I'm going to try and package this in a way where it's not too dense, but this is the sort of episode where you might want to grab a pen and paper and you might want to take notes because it's going to have quite a large educational element. So, let's just get straight in there. In a relationship, women's primary concern around feeling valued in the relationship is that we want to feel loved, right? We want to feel loved and we want to feel secure. We want to know that the man is going to be there, that he's not going to abandon us, he's not going to cheat on us. We want to know that he really wants to be with us. For a man, the equivalent is they want to feel respected and trusted by us. There was a study done by Shaunti Feldhahn, who is the author of a book called, 'For Women Only', and Feldahn did a professional survey of hundreds of men and asked them about love and respect. And Feldahn asked these men, "Would they prefer to feel disrespected or unloved?" and 74% chose that they would rather feel unloved than disrespected. And on top of that, a number of men in the survey were actually completely confused by this question because for them, respect actually equated directly to love. They couldn't differentiate between the two. So a woman wants to feel loved and adored, and a man wants to feel respected in a relationship. Now, why is it so important for an alpha male to feel respected? Why would they actually prefer to feel respected rather than loved. So, let's look at this from the perspective of what makes an alpha man 'alpha'. Their energy is all about being a leader, leading their tribe, leading their family, being the dominant energy in a group. Now, in order for an Alpha to hold that status, it's an absolute requirement that people look up to him. Another way of saying that is that it's an absolute requirement that others respect him and his position. On a very animalistic, instinctual level, if somebody in the tribe does not respect the leader, then they may challenge that leader for their position, which means as an alpha man, if he feels disrespected, there is a chance that somebody is going to try to come and take him down, which means a fight, it means war, it means battle, it means a potential threat to his life. Now, obviously, I'm talking at a very fundamental animalistic level here, instinctual level, but nonetheless, this exists subconsciously in the psyche of the men that we are in relationship with. So, respect for them is the ultimate love. It says, "I see you, I see you in your position. I value you.""I appreciate you and I support you to be in this position."

And through that transmission, what you're also subconsciously saying is: 8:54

"I am no threat to your safety.""I am not going to come at you to have a fight to battle, to try and take you down.""I see you and I respect your position." So, for alpha men, this goes really deep. It goes right down to their fundamental sense of safety. So, where women want to feel secure in a relationship, because that comes down to our sense of safety, this plays into the exact same sense of safety for an alpha man. So I came across an article by Paula Gallagher in the 'Evie' magazine, and actually, in this episode, I've used some of the material that Paula put in the article because I found it really supportive for the message I wanted to put through in this podcast. Now, the quotes that I found that are really beautiful are that women want to receive unconditional love, even in our unlovable moments. Men want to receive our respect even if he is not meeting our expectations in that moment. So ultimately, women want to be loved for who we are and men want to be respected for who they are. So what exactly does a man need to feel respected? Now, we can break this down into three main components to help us understand this better. So, for men, respect equals admiration and appreciation, trust and having your man's back at all times. Now, I'm going to dive deeper into each of these three things to help you understand what exactly does that mean and how do you, as a strong, independent woman in relationship with one of these beautiful, conscious alphas, how do you need to show up so that he can feel that from you? Ultimately, what we're going to be exploring in this podcast is how to love a conscious alpha man. So let's start by looking at this admiration and appreciation piece. Now, it's important to recognise that alpha men show their love mainly through actions. That means fixing things around the house, doing tasks for us and taking care of things that are physically demanding. So, when your man is doing these things for you, that is his way of loving you. Now, I appreciate that is not everybody's primary love language for how they want to receive love. You might be more a person who wants words of affirmation. Or you might be more of somebody who wants to receive gifts. You might be somebody who wants to receive touch or quality time. But the way that alpha men typically show love is through what we call acts of service. So, part of appreciating and admiring your man is to recognise this about him, to realise that every time he does this, this is him loving you. So to appreciate him for that. Say thank you when he does these things for you, and to genuinely feel appreciation in your heart for the many, many generous ways that he shows up in this capacity for you. You can tell him when he does things that you really appreciate. You can congratulate him on his successes and you can let him know that he's done a good job. Also, another way that men really feel respected is when you are proud of them and you show it and tell them. So be proud of him in everything he does. Men actually love to be greeted when they come through the door. So, for them this is quite an important ritual. It shows that you love them and it also shows respect. So, as soon as your man comes through the door, stop whatever it is you're doing and just take a moment to come and greet him in whatever way he prefers to be greeted. Now that might be a hug and a kiss, or it might be making him a coffee or just asking how his day was, but just this simple act of literally stopping everything you're doing, no matter how inconvenient it might feel, and just opening your heart and taking a moment to welcome your man home, it will be a big deal for him. Along a similar vein, when your man talks to you, when he speaks to you, stop what you're doing and be fully present with him. This shows that you appreciate what it is that he is sharing with you, and it shows an admiration for wanting to listen to what he has to say. Now I know that as a strong independent woman you are busy, busy, busy, right? Us strong independent women, we have always got 500 things, if not 5000 things on our to do list to get through in the day. So there will be an element of you that feels huge amounts of resistance to this. I can almost imagine you, hands on your hips,"What do you mean, I've got to stop what I'm doing,""and actually inconvenience myself to take a pause""when he determines that either he walks through the door or he's going to have a conversation?" And what I'm going to tell you might be a little bit difficult to hear but yes, you do. This is part of you stepping into your feminine energies because the feminine is highly flexible, highly moldable. The rigidity of the masculine energy, the doing energy is actually what will cause you conflict and trouble in your relationship with an alpha man. So, part of dropping into the feminine energies, which is what I talked a lot about in the first episode of this podcast is actually stopping what you're doing and returning to the mode of being. And this is exactly what it is that you are tuning into when you stop for that moment and greet him at the door, and stop for those moments when he's talking to you. Now, if you really are in the middle of something that you can't stop, you can say to him, just acknowledge that he wants to talk to you and you can actually just say something like,"Hey, honey, I hear you and I really want to be with you. Is it okay if I come back to you in two minutes?" Now, you approach it like this softness in your energy, a willingness to want to be present with him, he is going to be a yes on that, unless for some reason it's like super urgent, in which case stop whatever it is you're doing and go straight to him. This really is switching from the masculine energy, which is very direct, focused and driven. It's literally a straight line of energy, to the feminine energy, which is flowing and moving and slightly chaotic. It's very amenable and able to change in the moment. And this is exactly what you want to be mastering as you step more and more into balancing your energies, having that feminine energy on board. So this is a great exercise for that. Also, when your man is speaking, do not interrupt him. This is common courtesy for anybody, but especially for men, bearing in mind that respect equals love. If he is speaking, be present. Listen, wait until he has finished speaking before you say your piece. Equally, if you ask for his opinion, do not immediately dismiss it or negate it. If you ask for his opinion, listen to what he has to say and at least contemplate it. Hold it as valid. Respect the opinion that has been given.

Another piece that comes into this appreciation and admiration is: 17:40

in public or when you're with friends and families, take a moment to genuinely praise or celebrate your man. So if you're out with friends and if your man has recently achieved something, accomplished something, or done a good deed, just take a moment to genuinely from your heart... It has to be authentic, it has to be genuine. So, wait for a moment where this really just comes from your heart and bring it into conversation..."Hey, my man did this." Or, "Hey, my partner achieved this or accomplished this." Because this is a way of you shining your appreciation and admiration for him, which he is going to receive as respect, which he is going to receive as love. The final piece on admiring and appreciating your man is do not try to change him. Accept him as he is, for who he is. So this may take some getting to know him, understanding why he does things the way he does things, understand the background that he's come from, understand the culture that he was brought up in and why the things that he does are important to him. It's really, really important for you to not try to change him. If you are struggling with some of the ways that your man shows up, I really encourage you to go inwards and to look at the parts of you that are getting triggered by that and to work with yourself rather than try to change him. Now, this piece links really nicely to our next piece. The next aspect of how a man wants to be respected is a big one. It is to be trusted. And as a strong, independent woman, trust is something that we struggle with. So, I'm going to put some caveats around this and actually, to be honest, these caveats apply to everything I teach, but really importantly to this piece around trust. A conscious alpha man has an incredibly high integrity. When he is left to his own devices, he is self governing and his entire desire for his woman is to protect and provide for you. If you do not feel that you can trust the integrity of your man, this information that I'm teaching does not apply to you. And actually, I would go so far as to say that if you are in a relationship with a man that you do not trust the integrity of, leave. It is as simple as that. If you can't trust his integrity, there is no foundation to build trust of any nature and there is no foundation to build a relationship. So you are wasting your time. Get out now. Start afresh. Find a man that you can trust the integrity of. When you date somebody who you do trust the integrity of, you will very quickly realise that a man's deepest desire is to please his woman. Sometimes they get a little confused how to do it. But keeping his woman content and happy makes a man feel like he is winning at life. When you're dating a conscious alpha man, his whole instinct is to be the protector and the provider of the whole tribe, and his immediate tribe is you and your family. So his number one priority as a conscious alpha man is to protect you and to provide for you. This is the integrity that will guide him through everything. And if you are going to build a relationship with a conscious alpha man, you have to trust this 1000%. Any issues you've got around trusting this, you absolutely need to clear them out of your field because it will continue to trip you up time and time again and it is going to be the single contributing factor as to why you cannot make a relationship with a conscious alpha man last long term. Once you have got this piece rooted in your psyche, that actually your man has an exceptionally high integrity, and he is to be trusted, because even if he makes mistakes... Yes, he's human. Yes, he will make mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes and they are to be forgiven and they are to be corrected. Where this comes into his integrity, and this is the reason why you can trust him, even when he makes mistakes, is that when he makes a mistake, if you come to him with your open heart, with your vulnerability, not your attack, not your aggression, but your open, vulnerable heart, and let him know the pain that has been created because of his mistake, he will automatically self-correct very, very quickly. In fact, he may even go so far as to never, ever make that same mistake again because he sees the pain it has created for you and it conflicts with his instinct to protect you. So, a man with this level of integrity is never, ever going to hurt you intentionally. Yes, he might make mistakes, yes, he might screw up, yes, it might happen as an accident, but it will never, ever happen deliberately. This is a fundamental piece that you need to anchor into your psyche, because the rest of what I'm going to teach, and the rest of being in a relationship with an alpha man is built upon this foundation. So, coming back to respect and trust, always assume the best of him. This is why it's so important to have this integrity piece really anchored into your system. When you can learn to trust his integrity, you will always be able to assume that he is doing his absolute best in every moment, even in the moments when it doesn't look exactly how we would like it to look. Trusting him also means to trust that he is completely capable. This means letting him figure things out for himself, even in the moments where he's struggling. Do not treat him like a child. Do not treat him as someone who needs to be shown the way, needs to be helped, someone who is basically incapable. Because if you treat him like a child, like, he is going to feel that, he's going to feel that in your energy, that you're trying to mother him and that ultimately you don't trust his capability, you don't trust for him to show up as a fully grown adult. What you're basically saying is,"I don't think you're capable, I don't think you're a man.""I'm going to do this for you." And that is incredibly emasculating. So, by all means, if your man asks you for help, if he's like, "Hey, babe, how should I do this?" Or, "Hey, babe, could you help me with this?" By all means, step into that place of honour where he's actually invited you to help him. And these conscious men don't want to do it all by themselves, right? They do want our help. They do want us to be their Advice Council, but they don't want the Advice Council stepping in when they have not invited them to consult on a situation. So, let him figure things out. If it means he has to struggle and it's going to take a bit longer, then be patient. When he gets there by himself through trial and error, he will feel such a sense of accomplishment, and he will feel so much more pride and sense of capability within himself. You're really going to help to elevate his sense of self worth and self esteem. It's really a beautiful thing to let him do this. Another place that you need to trust is to trust his judgement and trust his decisions. This means, when he makes a judgement call, when he makes a decision, accept it and support it. You may not agree with it, but do not challenge it. Do not be so arrogant to think that you know better. This is a really big piece that us strong, independent women need to work with. We think that we know best. To be fair, we've been through a lot, right? We've overcome a lot. And the reason we think we know best is because actually we've been through all of those pieces. But we don't know best for him. We know best for ourselves, right? It does not mean that we know best for him. Let him be the leader. This really is the biggest piece of work that a strong, independent woman has to work on to truly achieve this piece of letting down our defences, so that we can truly love and show up for these beautiful, conscious alphas, and trusting his judgement, trusting his decisions, trusting his integrity... This is a massive, massive piece. Now, there may be some times where you genuinely have concerns about the decision or judgement call that your man has made. And absolutely, please do not misunderstand me. I am not saying that you need to be silent, you can never speak. I'm not saying that a conscious alpha man wants a mute woman. He does not. He absolutely does not. One of the things that he's actually drawn to about you is the fact that you do stand up for yourself and you won't let people walk all over you. This is where he gets to trust you as well. Respect is a mutual thing. It's a two way street. So, one of the things that a conscious alpha man is drawn to in a strong, independent woman is the fact that actually we do have the masculine energies on board. We can take care of ourselves. We're not going to let people walk all over us. We do have opinions. We've done a lot of things. We've accomplished things. We've got goals. We've got careers. We're going places in life, right? These are all qualities which, when a conscious alpha sees in us, it brings about respect in him for us. This is where the respect becomes mutual. So he does not want a mute woman. He does not want someone who has no opinion. But he wants that opinion to be shared with him from the feminine energies, not from the combative, conflicting, masculine energies. So, the way we do that is this... When you have a concern, perhaps you have seen something about a situation that he might not have seen, or perhaps you have a genuine concern about the direction that he's taking... The way to go about this is to speak from your heart, and hold the energy within you that you trust that he knows what he's doing. You are a side council to provide guidance for him, but you are not the decision maker. It is so important that you hold this energy in you when you communicate this to him. Because if you're holding the energy that, "I'm a decision maker, I know right." You are coming from your masculine, combative energies. By framing it in the way that I've just explained, you're in your soft, open, feminine energies, and you can express what your concerns are. You can say something like..."Hey, honey, I hear that you want to go in this direction, and I support you in that.""And I'm wondering, have you also considered these other pieces?""Have you also considered that this might be a possibility?" Or you could say something like..."I'm hearing that you want to go in this direction.""And I have a concern that X, Y, and Z could happen as a result of that. Have you considered that?" You'll notice the way I'm framing this? I am putting decision making control back in his court. If you think of it like a game of tennis, I am batting the ball back to him to be like..."This is your decision. This is your call.""But I want to let you know that I've seen these pieces. Have you considered them?" When you deliver it in this way, he will welcome your advice and actually be really grateful for it. Now, another beautiful quote from Paula Gallagher in 'Evie' was her definition of respect for a man..."I trust you. I believe in you.""I think you're capable and competent to fulfil your duties""as a man, as a husband, as a provider, and as a father." This really is the energy that you want to be holding in your being when you are interacting with your man, when you are thinking about your man, when you are communicating to your man. Ultimately, you want to be trusting that he has everything under control. This means not nagging him or reminding him, because by doing that, you are suggesting that he hasn't got it all under control. So, this is typically where women struggle with men... You've asked him to do something. You've said, "Hey, honey, could you take care of this for me?" And he said, "Yes, darling, I'll take care of this." And some days have gone by, or God forbid, some weeks have gone by, and it hasn't got done. Now, the story you're telling yourself is that he's forgotten, right?"Damn it, he hasn't remembered. He hasn't done this thing."

What I want you to shift your narrative to is: 32:57

'He is still holding this in his awareness, but he has put it much lower down the priority list than I want it to be.' So, yes, he's got it in his priority list. Yes, it's an awareness for him, but he thinks it's number twenty or number fifty on the list. You think it's number two. So, the way that you want to approach that is, again, coming to your heart and speaking in a way that trusts that he has got this... It's so important to have this in your energy, knowing that he's a busy man, he's got a schedule, and this is in his awareness and it's just lower on the list. So you can say something like..."Hey, darling, you know, we spoke about X, Y and Z?""Well, that's actually a really high priority for me because of these reasons...""And I was really hoping that it might be possible to get it done by, say, Friday.""I know that you're busy and I'm wondering, do you think it would be possible to fit it into your schedule""so that you could complete it by Friday for me?""If not, do we need to maybe jiggle some things around?""Or maybe I need to take care of that in order to meet that deadline?" And that way you're opening up an opportunity for him to say..."Yes, actually, I feel like I could do that." Or, "Actually, do you know what? If it's really that important, maybe you need to do it yourself." Now, if you are experiencing a lot of frustration, anger and resentment, and particularly if listening to this podcast, you're thinking, "How the hell am I ever going to do this?""I have no idea how I'm going to manage my emotions and try to show up in this way for my beloved." What I want to let you know is that underneath frustration, anger, and resentment are always some more vulnerable parts. They will typically be sadness or hurt. Now, how you get to those parts is by doing your personal development work to learn to recognise what is underneath these protective behaviours. Frustration, anger and resentment are all protection mechanisms to stop you feeling the pain or disappointment or sadness that is actually underneath them. This is a key part of what we do in Enchanted. But what I want to share with you that's really relevant to this podcast is that if you are experiencing frustration, anger or resentment, what that actually means is you are not trusting your man or not respecting his way of doing things. So, have a look at - where are you not trusting him to show up for you? Where are you not trusting that he is a protector and a provider and if he says he's going to do something, he will do it for you? So, when you get to those more vulnerable parts, when you can work out what your sadness is, or your pain is, or your hurt is, then you're in a position to share from your heart and let him know that you're struggling. You can say something like..."Hey, darling, when you did that thing the other day, it really made me feel this way." Or, "The fact that you haven't managed to prioritise this task for me""is really causing me to feel sad because it's making me feel like maybe you've forgotten about me" or whatever your things are. So you always want to bring your concerns to your man. Please understand that you do want to bring your concerns to your man. Don't try and hide them, don't try and pretend that they're not there, because then you're going to fall into the trap of harbouring energy, which you're not speaking to. And that's actually one of my future podcasts. I think it might be the next one that we're going to do. It's called, 'Just because you're not saying it, doesn't mean he can't feel it.' So, you don't want to get into the behaviour of not saying what is on your mind. But you do want to get into the behaviour of sharing from your heart, from your softer energies, where you're recognising that, actually, he's an incredibly capable and busy man who will show up for you in protection and provision. But you need to bring your concerns and struggles to him in a really soft and vulnerable way, for you to get the best out of him. So, this brings us onto our third and final part of what does a man need to feel respected. The third aspect of this is that he wants to feel like you have got his back at all times. Now, what exactly does that mean? So, having your man's back ultimately means operating as a team at all times. It means you are in this together. It means you are supporting each other, and trusting each other, and relying on each other. Now, learning to truly believe that your man is on your side, that he is actually going to show up for you and not let you down, and that he is genuinely going to be there for you, is probably going to be one of the biggest pieces of work that you need to do to be able to create a lasting relationship. Because all the time you are operating believing that you two are separate individuals, and that he hasn't got your back, and that he might turn on you at any moment, or he's probably going to let you down, you are constantly creating separation. You are constantly destroying the intimacy that is in your relationship. And you're constantly giving him the message that..."You don't have my back. And I don't have your back." Which translates to, "I don't respect you." Which translates to, " I don't love you." And I know that's not your truth. I know you do love him. I know you want to show up for him. I know you want to learn how to love him. But when you don't have his back, or believe that he doesn't have your back, you are saying that, "We're not on the same team." You're saying that, "We're separate. In fact, we're on opposing sides.""You're not my team, you're actually my enemy!" And therefore you come back to this whole place in the psychology of the man that, "We're at war." And he feels like you are trying to challenge his place for the dominant role in the tribe. And he feels that you might be a genuine threat to his safety because he is going to challenge you or you're going to challenge him to a duel, which is going to result in one of you having to die because that is the only way that an alpha man will ever give up his status. Right? So this is the fundamental psychology that is playing out subconsciously every time you don't show respect and trust for your man. Now, the ways that we can show our man that we are on the same side as him and we do want to operate as a team with him are these ways... Always giving him the benefit of the doubt, believing in him even when it looks like he's failing, inspiring him to go for his dreams and trusting in his knowledge, opinion and decisions, conveying respect and trust in the way that you speak to him through your tone, your volume and the inflections in your voice. Now, this really ultimately comes down to your energy. If your energy is carrying the message of..."I respect you and I trust you and I see you as the leader. Ultimately, I see you as my Alpha." Then your voice and your tone and your inflections will naturally transmit that. Now, a big part of having your man's back and operating as a team happens in the public domain, happens when you're with friends, family, out to dinner, anywhere where you are out and about. And the ways that you can support this unified front that, "We are a team.""We operate together. We have got each other's back..." is never criticising him in public or in front of others, even jokingly. Just don't go there. Don't tease him about anything he's failed at or anything he feels insecure at in front of other people. Don't bring up problems in your relationship in front of other people. Always discuss problems privately and directly with your man. Now, you might be thinking...'But, obviously I'm going to talk to my girlfriends, right?' This is going to be a little bit difficult to hear, but speaking negatively to your girlfriends about your man is disrespectful. You are giving your girlfriends the message that..."I don't respect him and you don't need to respect him either." So, how do you deal with this? Problems are going to come up in your relationship. You are going to need to have someone to talk to, right? So what do you do about this? How do you handle your problems? Choose one, or possibly two at the most, conscious friends that you trust who can truly help you access what is triggering you underneath the parts of you that are feeling frustrated, angry, and resentment. You want to have a friend who can really help you dig down and find the vulnerable parts of you so that you can work with those vulnerable parts and heal them and bring them to him in a way that is soft and gentle and that he can receive. Now, if you don't have somebody like that in your life, come and jump into the chambers at Enchanted Academy for Love, because this is a confidential space where you can receive support and guidance on your relationship issues. That means we can help you work through the difficult parts of yourself and the difficult challenges that come up in relationships, because, believe me, they do. No relationship is smooth sailing. Every relationship has its challenges, and that is completely natural. And it's actually the way that you deal with the challenges that make your relationship strong. Conscious relationships - just because they've got the word 'conscious' in front of them, that doesn't mean that they don't have problems. Conscious relationships is exactly how you deal with the problems. It doesn't mean the problems don't exist. Now, I want to give you one beautiful example of a couple having each other's back, and showing a unified front. Now, this actually comes from the Game of Thrones, where Ned Stark was being challenged by Cersei. And Cersei said, "Do you know what your wife has done?" She's speaking in a very accusational voice. She is effectively challenging Ned..."Your wife has done something really bad. Do you know what it is?" And Ned's response was, "She did nothing that I did not command." And what he's saying in that is, "Whatever she did, I fully support it.""I am fully on board with it. Even though I don't know what she did, I'm having her back, regardless." And this is the sort of energy that you want to cultivate in your relationship, that even when you don't know what your partner's done, you are willing to stand for them, no matter what. So on that note, I'm going to start to bring this to a close. How do I recommend that you deal with these things going forward with your man? Well, the best way to deal with anything like this is to actually have a conversation with your man. Ask him, "What does respect look like to you?" Ask him, "What do you need from me to feel respected?" And also ask him, "What things would cause you to feel disrespected, if I did them?" When you know the answer to these questions, you can choose how to show up. You obviously want to avoid the things that would cause him to feel disrespected and you want to do more of the things that would cause him to feel respected by you. Now, the next episode will be "Let's talk about anger." This is going to be all about helping you to understand what your anger, resentment and frustration is about, and helping you navigate that to get below your defences, so that you can get to your vulnerable parts, really for you to start to cultivate more of a compassionate, self loving, self supportive voice. So that's what we're going to be looking at in the next episode. Do tune in for that. And finally, I want to leave you with one last piece. Most women do not understand how incredibly powerful their energy is just by the innate nature of you being a woman. You come with an exceptional level of power in your being. And as a powerful woman, we have two choices with our men. We can build our men or we can break them. If we break them, nobody wins. But if we build them, everybody wins. Thank you for listening. Thank you for being open and receptive to what I'm teaching. Please do like subscribe and share to get this message out there so that ultimately more women can have their Happy Ever After. Because that's exactly what this channel is all about. If you've got any questions or comments, check us out on YouTube, The Enchanted Love Podcast. You can leave questions or comments there and we will read those. I hope you have enjoyed this episode and I look forward to connecting with you on the next one.[Outro music]